Life is always changing, sometimes it is for the best and change is good. Other times the change happens around us and we have no control over it at all. Those kinds of changes leave us with a choice; Will we grow and learn how to stand strong or will we bend and break under the weight of change.
During the last year of my life there have been a lot of changes I have had to make and get used to. Some of them I have willing made, and some I have had to make to keep my marriage strong.
If someone had said to me last year that I would be writing a blog for the world to read, (okay maybe not the world right now, but there are a hundred or so of you faithful that read what I have to say), that just blows me away.
Or that I would start a book and fly across country to meet with publishers to share my book proposal all by myself, when I am afraid to fly. (See my earlier post I survived suicide! But I‘m afraid to fly! )
One of the biggest changes of all was the sale of our business! You can read all about that too in Change is hard for me. It tells why we needed to sell the shop and make that change.
God calls each of us to make changes all the time, some are easy and fun – we look forward to something new. Then there are others (like me) that even good changes bring out stress and an overwhelming feeling of being out of control.
Some of you may laugh at what my new stress is about; but for me it has been hard. As the day approaches, like tomorrow, I have to just pray and take deep breaths.
It is about taking a vacation!
I know, people do it all the time. They spend money; they go and have fun and relax, enjoy themselves each year. It is something that I have never done! Yes we have taken small little trips here and there. Sure we were given a cruise for our anniversary; been camping with the kids; gone hiking and skiing; all having a great time.
Never have we spent thousands of dollars on one trip for just us! When asked where we are going, I say, “Belize!” The reply is, “Oh for missions?” That just adds to my guilt and stress. Others go and have fun just because! So why do I feel like I can’t?
It is something in my DNA I guess. That is why I am married to a dreamer, so that he can help me spread my wings and fly, or in this case snuba. Yes my honey is the reason we are taking this trip. He has always wanted to go places like this in his life and his birthday is this week.
So off we go to Belize to see the sights and relax. I will admit that after three flights and a whole day of travel, I am looking forward to eight days on a beach with no cell phone within reach.